Today I bring you a story from my childhood turned into a career and life lesson. As with most teaching moments, I definitely didn’t see anything positive about that experience at the time (in fact, I ended up crying!), but years later, I can fondly look back at it and see that it was, indeed, a powerful lesson that can be applied to almost anything.
Ready to dive in?
When I was about seven, and my brother was ten, he used to be lumbered with looking after me when going out and about on our bikes, let that be around the park or the neighbourhood. It wasn’t an easy task, since riding a bike has never been my forte, and I remember my chain coming out on countless occasions (how?), and him having to fix it and get his hands dirty… He was (still is, bless him!) such a nice big brother. Love to you, Albert! ❤️
As a good little sister myself, I followed him everywhere.
One day, we were riding our bikes on the park behind our home, where there were some pétanque courts. If you’ve ever been near one, you’ll know that the court is delimited by a kerb all around it, maybe 5cm tall.
My brother decided that, since there was no one playing on the courts, we’d go across them. So he rode straight over the “bump” of the kerb. Smooth. Effortless. No hesitation.
So I did what younger siblings do best: I copied him.
Same speed. Similar bike. Same bump on the kerb.
But, as I was going over it, I fell off my bike, grazed my knee and burst into tears.
My brother came back, helped me up and gave me a hug. When he asked what happened, I said that I’d just gone over the bump (probably at considerable speed), just like he had, but I had fallen.
How come you haven’t fallen?
You have to lift the front wheel to go over the bump.
That was the moment of revelation. Simple. Straight forward. And, if you think about it, logical.
He had lifted the wheel, but I just hadn’t seen it.
From my perspective, we’d done exactly the same thing, but got different results. From reality’s perspective, we absolutely had not, which logically explains the different results.
I often think about the “lift-the-front-wheel” career and life lesson.
When we compare ourselves to others, we usually compare what we can see, and forget everything that was required to get there.
The career and life lesson
What we see
- The outcome
- The title
- The confidence
- The smooth ride over the bump
What we DON’T see
- The skills previously learned
- The failure absorbed privately
- The extra support
- The front wheel being lifted
So when we try to “do the same thing” and get different results, it doesn’t mean we’re worse, slower, incapable or useless.
It may simply mean we haven’t been shown what they learned years ago.
Comparison often feels like a judgment when, in reality, it’s just missing information. Focus on learning how to lift your front wheel.
The bumps don’t go away… but they get easier to cross.
If you’re feeling the “bump” of a new project, you might find my thoughts on dealing with uncertainty helpful. Or not. YMMV 😉
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